Year 2015 funny status updates

Here are some status updates that will make you laugh like never before. These status updates were collected from some witty people across social networks. Do send in your ideas too if you have some for funny status updates of facebook we'd love to get them here. We can share these with our friends and family. Status updates for facebook and twitter and other social media platforms.

The best way to create your future is to create it

Sleep all your troubles away.

I’m not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.

It’s not how we make mistakes, but how we correct them that define us.

If you ain’t first, you are last.

I’m gonna rest of my life, the best of my life.

The best dreams happen when eyes are open.

Beauty is not in the face; beauty is alight in the heart.

Respect is one of life’s greatest treasures…

Why worry about things you cannot change? Let go and move on, because LIFE isn’t waiting.

I’m making changes in my life so if you don’t hear from me, you’re one of them.

A pretty girl is nothing if she has an ugly heart.

You killed what was left of the good in me.

The PAST cannot be changes, forgotten. Edited or erased: it can only be accepted.

If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.

Choose the work you love and you will never have to work every day.

A fake smile can hide a million tears.

Smile and let everyone know that today, you’re a lot stronger than you were yesterday.

You never know how strong you are…until being strong is the only choice you have.

You can do anything but not everything.

A best friend is life a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have.

Strong people know how to keep their life in order. Even with tears in their eyes, they still manage to say I’m ok with a smile.

Life is better when I’m drunk.

Fake friends are around when they think you're cool true friends are around even when they think you're fool.

I’m just waiting to see to if my coffee chooses to use its powers for good or evil today.

Friendship is when people know all about you but like you anyway.

Cheating is easy try something challenging and be faithful.

face book is the only place where it's acceptable to talk to a wall

I don't have an attitude problem i just have a personality you can't handle.

I don't stop when I’m tried; I stop when I’m done.

Nobody dies virgin cause in the end life F***s us all.

Love is all you need.

Dear math please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

I dreamed a dream.

Giving up doesn’t always mean you are weak. Sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile then walk into a pole. :D

No one rises suddenly in the World, Not Even the Sun.

Be polite to everyone don’t sweat the small stuff, and be positive-it’s contagious!

Life will serve you best if you love it as much as you love yourself.

“’Different” and ‘New’ is relatively easy. Doing something that’s genuinely better is very hard.”  Sir Jony Ive, Apple

There is only happiness in this life, to love and be loved.

I want to be your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

The word ‘happiness’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.

I don’t make mistakes I just date them.

We fall in love by chance. We stay in love by choice.

Be yourself because an original is worth more than a copy.

The first duty of LOVE is to LISTEN.

I can and I will. Watch me!!

When you want to give up remember why you started.

Top and funniest status updates of 2015

These status updates are taken from facebook status updates, they are funny, witty and hilarious status upates. These facebook status updates that are funny can be used as status updates in your facebook status updates too!! :) Just copy and paste, its that easy now to get funny status updates in your facebook status update!! :)

I’m not failed…my success is just postponed for some time.

When nothing seems right….go left!!

Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.

Love thy neighbor. But don’t get caught.

If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

A woman is like a tea bag, you cannot tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

Don’t drink and park – accidents cause people.

When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?

 Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

A BOSS is like a diaper... Always on your ass, and usually full of Shi***t

Ever read a book that changed your life? Me neither.

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain’t so hot.

When a girl says she’ll be ready in 5 more minutes, it’s the same as when a guy says the game has 5 minutes left. :D

I come up with the best ideas when sitting on the toilet then forget them after the flush.

Hey Mate…you There…Whatsapp is using me. :D

Etc= End of thinking Capacity.

Only Marriage is the major cause of divorce.

If you are player then I’m the GAME.

Awesome ends with ME and Ugly starts with you.

You can disturb me….I’m available. :D

Some people call me Mike, You can call me tonight.

Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal this status.

Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.

Every problem comes with a solution. If it doesn’t have any solution, it’s a…………. Girl :)

Insult and wife are somewhat similar....They always look good...If it is not yours

I'm Jealous of My Parents... I'll Never Have a Kid as Cool as Theirs!

I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

Love your girl like you love your Coffee… Enjoy it before its hotness goes.

☺  Behind this smile is everything you’ll never understand.

We all feel a little f**d up sometimes.

If I’m wired with you. I like you.

I love buying new things but I hate spending money.

Stop waiting for one Day. Today is the Day- Bang-Bang

I hate math but I love counting money.

I believe in hate at first sight.

There’s always a person that you hate for no reason.

If I get jealous then yes I really like you.

The Earth without Art is just Eh.

We all are born to die don’t feel more special than me.

I’m not arguing, I’m simply tried to explaining why I’m Right.

Laziness is me middle name.

I wonder if I've met the person I’m going to marry.

Math Rule: If it seems easy, you’re doing it wrong.

I need Google in my brain.

You have eyes my dear but you cannot see.

I’m not weird, I’m limited edition.

The problem is not the problem; the problem is your attitude about the problem.

If you fall. I’ll be there.

Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?